Comments for Single Dating Diva

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Ana Wilde (@lvfromana)

Ana Wilde (@lvfromana) — Thu, 23 May 2013 15:10:58 +0000

I don’t think you need to settle for anyone. Having lots of dates with lots of people until you find one who makes you not care about going out with others seems like a good plan. See where each relationship takes you.

As long as you are open about not being exclusive when you start to date, you give yourself a chance to get to know those you meet a bit better and have them grow on you.

I’m just talking about personality here because, for me, in the past, if the initial attraction wasn’t there, I probably wouldn’t have gone on a second date. Does chemistry grow over time? Maybe, but I think there has to be an initial spark of some kind. I definitely wouldn’t settle for a relationship without any spark.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by girlseule

girlseule — Wed, 22 May 2013 19:25:18 +0000

I really believe the heart wants what the heart wants. It’s not about being picky, you can’t help how you feel about someone and if you just aren’t feeling it there isn’t much that can be done, no matter how wonderful the other person is.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:47:17 +0000

That they do!!

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Jacob

Jacob — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:46:25 +0000

Absolutely! Gut instincts usually come from the heart, don’t they?!

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:32:58 +0000

But there’s definitely something to be said about your gut instincts. Sometimes it just doesn’t feel right and there’s nothing wrong with that. Perhaps that’s even more significant than first impressions.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Jacob

Jacob — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:31:14 +0000

I understand the importance of 1st impressions, but I know from experience they’re not always indicative of who a person truly is. That impression is easily influenced by stress, health, family, and/or financial issues he/she was going through when you two met.

Talk to them 2 months later and they could be in a COMPLETELY different place. Remember that guy you thought was kind of cute, but something turned you off? Maybe it’s worth a text or phone call to see…

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:08:56 +0000

And the Oscar goes to … lol

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:08:31 +0000

Thanks Jacob! So you’re not a fan of first impressions?

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:06:58 +0000

I know what you mean, selection is not that great so somebody is better than nobody, right? Well, not right because sometimes being alone is better than being unhappy with someone.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:05:18 +0000

Thanks Dan! Yes, well we can never know really can we? Perhaps we’re just waiting for the one who will pleasantly surprise us?

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Dan

Dan — Wed, 22 May 2013 15:41:15 +0000

YUP… I agree. I once met a lovely lady – she looked way better in person, than on her online dating profile- I thought we got along really well, and was expecting at least another date or meet up. Nope.. she did not feel the same way. I guess she should have won the Acadamy Award for her performance during out first date – Yes, she was an actress

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Jacob

Jacob — Wed, 22 May 2013 15:28:53 +0000

Always a topic of conversation. I believe an individual should have reasonable standards and non-negotiables that are specific to their unique personality. However, looking at others as “settle or not settle” can be a very misleading stance. This is one of the negative aspect of online dating. Often times we only give the person one chance over the course of 1 or 2 hours, then a decision is made on if the person “fits” us.

We don’t see or talk to him/her day to day, so we are effectively judging the meal by a crumb. This is absurd, but I’ve done it and I’ve been on the receiving end as well.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Chronicles (@1SingleLadyBug)

Single Chronicles (@1SingleLadyBug) — Wed, 22 May 2013 15:10:40 +0000

I agree about holding out for the right one – but my case, its not that there’s too many choices, I seem to not be able to really meet ANYbody, so when someone does come along, I’m tempted to settle because its so hard to meet people.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Chin Up, Chest High!

Chin Up, Chest High! — Wed, 22 May 2013 15:01:31 +0000

No, on the contrary I think if we drop the mercenary attitude and pay attention to what is actually in front of us, it can work really well.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Dan

Dan — Wed, 22 May 2013 14:41:53 +0000

Good chat points Miss Diva. The times that I have “settled” for a relationship with lady, that did not come close to what I was looking for, it always seemed to end in me becoming very frustrated and MAD – at myself. At first, one feels a false sense of happiness to meet someone to “do things with” – but that fades away fast…. and you fall into a deep rut where you cannot see other opportunities for healthier matches. I keep wondering over the years how many great match ups I may have missed, while keeping busy with someone that was convenient and available to do stuff with. Anyway, I recently have made a decision that I do not want to just settle for that “anyone”, but will just relax, sit back, watch and wait for that “right one” to come by. But …hope I can speak up and connect with that lady who is like minded, fun and can look past her emotional baggage.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by NealCormier

NealCormier — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:28:23 +0000

Right, well but isnt the question, what are those “basic” needs and what is their nature? I do not think we are setting ourselves up for dissappointment, because there are 3 or 4 billion opposite sex members out there and we have scientific instruments at our disposal. No other age. I enjoyed dating too, the thrill the hunt, sex, fake love is fun too when you think it’s real…

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:23:15 +0000

Thanks Neal! So glad you enjoyed it. It’s really hard to make that choice or to take that step when something better might be out there, but, are we setting ourselves up for disappointment? I don’t know. Love is what you make it I think, but some basic needs have to be met.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:21:57 +0000

Thanks so much Stacia! Glad you liked it

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:21:44 +0000

Thanks for your comment! I like your comparison with gambling, I never thought of it that way, but you’re right … so do the odds ensure our prospects are not good?

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by NealCormier

NealCormier — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:19:06 +0000

Well, on one hand, I definitely agree that increasing expectations will bring progressive heartache. On the other hand, I do not think the answer is to give in to pragmatism as a way of resolving love. The fact of the matter is, the reason we dwell on this topic at all is because we are unwilling to be alone as a bottom line. I say, its a numbers game and we live in the best age to do that. I’ve found the thunderbolt love and had settled for 6 years before…love is not practical, it is the emotional result of your highest values reflected in that of another. Nothing to throw away. Be alone or be with the best. But monitor how your values might change. Mine really never have. Love how you present and write.

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Stacia

Stacia — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:17:57 +0000

Awesome!!! Awesome!!!

Comment on Holding Out For Something Better by Chin Up, Chest High!

Chin Up, Chest High! — Wed, 22 May 2013 10:56:57 +0000

I am a great believer in online dating, it has really worked for me. However I feel it exacerbates the problem. Men and women are like children in a sweet – men because we have a seemingly unending supply of singles to contact, women because of the sheer volume of messages they get every single day.

It is too easy to think “this date was 80% great but that isn’t enough… let’s see what else is out there.” I’ve had fantastic first dates with a couple of women who went silent at my request for a second date. Perhaps they thought there was something better around the corner? Who knows? Perhaps like a gambling addict we all thing that the big win is just around the corner.

Comment on To Settle or Not To Settle … That Is The Question! by Holding Out For Something Better | Single Dating Diva

Holding Out For Something Better | Single Dating Diva — Wed, 22 May 2013 10:51:08 +0000

[…] think I am, I think I’m being selective. I’ve found myself asking the question “To Settle or Not To Settle” every time I meet someone new. I always choose not to settle. Why? Well, that’s […]

Comment on PLEASE VOTE FOR ME – Great Dating Blogs 2013 by Single Dating Diva

Single Dating Diva — Tue, 21 May 2013 15:02:56 +0000

Thanks so much!! Stay tuned!! XO

Comment on PLEASE VOTE FOR ME – Great Dating Blogs 2013 by Dan

Dan — Tue, 21 May 2013 15:00:55 +0000

OK Sis….. It just went through – my vote that is :- So you won in 2012? WOW…..Hope that happens again xoxo