I’ve said this before, and I will keep saying it. Dating is one big game with many players. You need to use strategy, intelligence, trickery and bravery to win it. But can you win? Is it one of those games where no one comes out the winner but everyone comes out a loser? I’m starting to wonder. It seems that in the midst of the game playing, humanity is lost. We sometimes forget that the players have emotions, baggage and agendas (us included). Some play fair, and some don’t. It is true that you have to be cunning and sometimes manipulative in order to get ahead, but at what cost? You never win. I have been playing this game for many years, both before and after my marriage. Marriage is a different game altogether! Didn’t end up a winner there either … hmm what am I doing incorrectly? Is my strategy off? Am I playing with the wrong set of rules? Perhaps I’ve got it all wrong. I don’t know. Is it me?
I have been reflecting on the past year especially. I’ve tried being nice with men, I’ve tried being a bitch with men, I’ve tried being assertive, I’ve tried being passive … I’ve been forgiving and not so forgiving. Still I am not any more ahead in the game than I started. It’s like one of those board games that you reach a certain square and it tells you to go back to the beginning. That’s where I am. I see each square as a stage in dating. Square one is meeting someone, square two is getting to know them, square three is the first date, square four is the second date … and so on. However, it seems, that I keep hitting the “go back to the beginning” square each time. Am I playing with the wrong set of dice? I wonder.
Those of you who have been following my blog since the beginning (thank you) … have you noticed anything wrong with my approach? Let me think back. Perhaps I am making the wrong choices in men. But, I can’t help what I like. Besides, I married the “nice guy” and look where that got me. Perhaps I should boycott penises altogether! I don’t know anymore. I do know that the ending of a relationship is definitely a blessing in many ways because it wasn’t meant to be. It doesn’t make it easier though. My heart has been broken so many times it’s a wonder it’s still beating!
Love, dating and relationships are portrayed as magical and attainable while the reality is that people treat it like a game, a game with its own set of rules, a game that only a select few win (if any). As ABBA sang “The Winner Takes It All” … coincidentally one of my favorite songs of all time! So when is it my time to win? Perhaps I need to not play by the rules anymore … something to think about …
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
Copyright Single Dating Diva