Yes, you heard right … I said crazy lady syndrome. What’s that? Everyone has encountered it. You know what I’m talking about. It’s when a perfectly sane woman turns insane because of a man’s actions (or inactions). What was it that George Carlin said? Oh yes “Here’s all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.” What do you think? He’s right? Wrong? Is the only reason women get crazy because men make them that way? Or are some women just more prone to craziness? I have been thinking about that lately, especially after a discussion with one man about his experience with a seemingly normal woman who became high on the crazies list.
Crazy Lady Syndrome
So let me talk about myself first. Have I tested the crazy waters before? Yes, I admit it, but when I was much younger and less mature. I used to go all crazy on a guy if he didn’t call or if he didn’t give me attention. I used to sit by the phone waiting and imagining every worst case scenario possible. By the time the poor guy actually called I was already wound up to the point of no return. Needless to say, I wasn’t very successful in relationships. I have grown out of that. How did I grow out of that? By becoming more confident in myself! I know who I am, I know what I have to offer and if a man decides he doesn’t want it then too bad for him, someone else will appreciate it. It’s true. Why should I stress myself out? I have to lose my sanity for someone who doesn’t even care enough to give me the time of day?
Now, this doesn’t mean I don’t get anxious if I don’t hear from someone, but I don’t go crazy on them. There is a mature way of handling any situation. I have a tendency to have the crazies sometimes if a person has totally done me wrong, but usually it’s on my own, not to someone. But guys aren’t totally innocent either. They play it cold sometimes when they know their girl needs reassurance. Not cool. But perhaps it’s a case of the “mismatched”. Think about it … a needy girl/guy should be with a nurturing/superhero type. People should be with others who meet their needs. I need a guy who doesn’t call me every 5 minutes, but I do like a guy who “touches base” each day. By being with the right person, it will ensure that there won’t be any crazy lady moments.
So, what do you do if he doesn’t call? Well, don’t freak out. Guys think differently than girls. Seriously. There may be a million reasons why he hasn’t been stalking you. Take a few deep breaths, go for a run, listen to music, whatever, just don’t freak out. Maybe he’s busy, maybe he’s working … who knows, but I would give it a couple days. If someone is really interested in you he will call, or message or something. If it becomes a habit that he doesn’t call for days at a time, well then you need to re-assess your relationship and expectations. What are your needs? Is he meeting them?
Trust me, I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum … I’ve had the ones who wouldn’t leave me alone and those who never call. I think somewhere in between is best for me. I love attention and for me I enjoy getting “touch base” messages; it doesn’t have to be full blown conversations. We’re adults, we have work and life and if you can’t handle a little space between you and your honey bunny then perhaps you should find another honey bunny who better meets your needs. Plain. Simple.
Stirring the Dating Sauce,
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
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