Actions ALWAYS Speak Louder Than Words – Recognizing Manipulative Dishonesty

Actions ALWAYS Speak Louder Than WordsPeople may not always tell you how they feel about you, but they will always show you!

Often times when we meet someone new, dating or we’re in a relationship with someone we really really like, we tend to turn a blind eye to some indiscretions and we ignore red flags. Why? Well because we really really like them! One such red flag is someone showing you their true colors through their actions but because they talk a good talk you ignore it. We’ve all been in these situations. I actually hear about it a lot from my readers. We really want to believe that what our partners are saying is true and that they have good intentions, but, really, deep down inside we know the truth because they showed us the truth.

Actions ALWAYS Speak Louder Than Words.

Many people are good at selling their good sides and hiding their bad sides. They talk a good talk. They tell you everything you want to hear. I’ve spoken about these types before. I’ve dated these types before. They get what they want by manipulating other people. Some people fall for it while others not so much. I meet these types quite often. Usually I don’t bother with them.  Sometimes, however, I play along in hopes that maybe (just maybe) they are honest, but, inevitably everyone shows their true colors (honest or not). Inevitably, their actions speak louder than their words.

How Actions ALWAYS Speak Louder Than Words

“When someone shows you who they are believe them.” (Maya Angelou)

What are some of the signs that someone is being insincere and manipulative?

Here are some red flags to watch out for:

  • They don’t keep their promises (more often than not).
  • They always know what to say to make you feel better or make you happy.
  • They can always turn a situation around to their benefit to look innocent and usually will play the martyr.
  • They are good at always getting what they want in life and with you.
  • You are left wondering what happened when you thought you were in control of a situation.
  • They make you feel guilty for second guessing them and when you raise a concern they say “oh so you’re punishing me because others hurt you”.
  • They use love as a bargaining tool by saying “if you loved me or really wanted me you would do this or that”.
  • They are dishonest and/or tell you half truths as well as twisting stories to their favor.
  • You know or have heard from reputable sources about their shadiness.
  • They don’t contact you for days at a time and then show up apologizing saying that they were busy with whatever oh so important thing that they couldn’t even take 2 seconds to text a hello or respond to your hello.
  • Your gut instincts tell you the pieces of the puzzle just aren’t fitting quite right.

NOT Ideal Partners.  Certainly NOTKeepers.

I know, I know, everyone has done these things I know (even you and me), but I’m talking about people who make these things a habit, it’s a part of who they are. They are narcissistic and selfish personalities, perhaps even sociopaths, only looking out for themselves. You know who they are. Remember to date smart. Know what you’re getting into with who you’re getting into it with.

You deserve better than someone who is manipulative and dishonest. You deserve a partner who shows you how they feel, who doesn’t just tell you. You deserve a partner you don’t have to wait around for. You deserve a partner who makes you feel like the king or queen of the world.

If you find that great partner remember to treat them great too … there is nothing more awesome than a mutually respectful relationship full of trust, love and honesty. Imagine that … does that even exist anymore? Sometimes I wonder but then I see people in good, happy, healthy, fulfilling relationships and I won’t settle for anything less!!

I would love your feedback and comments! Have you been in a manipulative relationship where they were all talk?

Your Sister in Dating Bliss,

Single Dating Diva

Copyright Single Dating Diva


  1. This post is soooo very true. I recently was involved with someone who was manipulative and dishonest. My gut was in high gear and I wanted to believe him but I just didn’t follow my gut because I liked him so much. I listened to him and didn’t watch his actions…. some of the stories he would tell me were like really? lol! I am now trying to get over the mistake I made of not listening to my gut…. When they say listen to your gut, that is so very important to do….


  2. I just broke it off with a man i had been seeing for two months long distance. He would go for days without calling/texting then when i finally got at him, he would say that he was busy, or (and this is true) “I knew that if i texted you, the conversation would get so good that i wouldn’t be able to stop so I just decided not to”. He came to my city for other business, could have been here for a whole week after it, for us to catch up, but he sent me a message the day after, saying he was on his way back to his city as he didn’t really have anything else to do here (??) and assumed i’d be too busy to hang out (he knew I was on holidays from works for 2 weeks) then when i asked him about that, he said he wanted us to work on our long distance distance communication first before hanging out in person. I could only buy so much rubbish


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