For those who market themselves the right way, one benefit (or not) of online dating and the current dating climate is that you can generate a lot of dates with a lot of different people in a short period of time. Whether it’s because they love the high of first dates, they just can’t find what they want, or they just can’t resist all those offers, serial dating has become quite common among many singles. Some would call it “too much dating”. This certainly isn’t the experience of everyone, but for many it is.
Dating more than one person at a time is all about intention and respect. There is absolutely nothing wrong with testing the dating waters before you jump in. When one person stands out from the crowd, most people will naturally focus on them alone and stop dating others. Dating more than one person at a time is a good way to get to know what kind of person you want to be with by the process of elimination.
If you’re looking for love, what happens when you’ve met more than one person that you would like to pursue but can’t decide which one you want? Can you date more than one person at a time? Is there such thing as TOO MUCH dating? It depends how you do it. It’s important that you proceed in a very open, honest and respectful way.
Is There Such Thing As Too Much Dating?
Too much dating CAN be a thing, but if you want to date more than one person at a time then you just have to keep a few things in mind:
- Be honest and fair. Don’t give anyone the impression that you are exclusive when you’re not. Remember the “Golden Rule” and treat others as you want to be treated. No need, however to kiss and tell.
- Manage expectations. Set no expectations and have no expectations. Don’t get caught up in the moment or make empty promises either. If you’re not exclusive but they are, make it clear that you’re not on the same page at this time. Don’t be a time waster.
- Enjoy the moment. Enjoy the process and let things flow naturally. It will help you make a better decision about your date. Don’t worry about the long-term outcome at this point. The first and second dates are just about “getting to know” someone to see if you want to pursue something more, so no pressure on yourself or them. Slow and steady wins the race every time.
- Be realistic. If you’re “playing the field”, they probably are too. This is the reality of dating in the digital age. Never ever assume that they’re not seeing other people unless it’s explicitly stated.
- Date with purpose. Dating should be fun but don’t lose sight of your ultimate desired outcome, whatever your desired outcome is. If you’re looking for a long term relationship then it’s important to narrow down your list sooner rather than later. Don’t waste your time on a dead end street.
- And most importantly – Schedule Wisely! Make sure not to double book! Also, don’t date so much that you stop dating altogether, dating fatigue is real! Too much dating can be too much if you overdo it.
Usually, you will know after two or three dates if you would like to keep seeing someone and eventually you will naturally drop some in favor of others. Don’t lose sight of your goal, however. You’re trying to get to know these people better in order to know if they are right for you. If you’re looking for a long-term relationship, dating more than one person at a time should only be a temporary arrangement. Dating should be fun and should have a purpose, keep that in mind and your experience will be a positive one.
I recently spoke about this on CTV Ottawa Morning, check out the video by clicking here:
READERS: Do you think there is such thing as too much dating or is it necessary in the current dating climate? Share your thoughts & perspective in the comments below!
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
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My opinion is this, if meeting via online then it makes sense to date several people at once but to me in this context “dating” is more of a meeting than anything romantic at that point. However, once anything sexual comes into play (kissing, sex, etc) then doing that to more than one person is playing with fire, unless that is what you are looking for.
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Thanks Dawn, I agree, that’s why it’s good to define for yourself and others what dating means for you. Being honest helps alleviate any future problems or expectations.
Definitely agree. I really don’t understand why people can’t be honest upfront.
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