Segment 53: Unrequited Love
Main Points: Unrequited Love (Obsessive Love)
- Show of hands, who always wants what they can’t have? The more we can’t have it, the more we want it!
- The allure of unrequited love is magnetic. There is nothing worse than wanting someone so badly and knowing you can’t have them. Nothing worse than finding the one you know you should be with but, as fate would have it, it’s not meant to be. Romeo and Juliet anyone?
- Countless readers have written me about these very situations. I’ve also been in their shoes and it sucks. But are we just succumbing to our romantic notions rather than sticking to reality? Perhaps.
- It takes over your life. Problem is that you can’t give yourself completely to anyone else, nor can you just disconnect from your obsession completely. It’s like you’re dancing with the devil – it’s a slippery slope you can’t escape from.
- I know how frustrating and painful it is to meet who you think is “the one”, even your soulmate and you just can’t have them. It’s like almost being able to reach something on the top shelf but you just can’t get to it, even when you think you’re making progress, you’re not.
- Romeo and Juliet ended up dead because their obsessions consumed them. That’s not romantic. It’s ego driven and lacks a mature understanding of what love really is.
- We have this strange notion that love should be this crazy insane “us against the world” kind of thing when in reality it’s all about having our needs met and of course, stability.
- We get into love affairs that are fed by our imaginations and logic goes out the window. What fuels the fire is the whole notion “forbidden love” or wanting what you can’t have.
- Psychologists give three reasons we do this:
the first is that when something is forbidden you instinctively give it more importance, secondly you want it more because you think it’s valuable, and thirdly is that we don’t like to be told we can’t have or can’t do something. Sound familiar?
- What you need to do is look at the people in your life and their role, contribution and purpose. Be honest about it.
- Unrequited love isn’t romantic … being with someone who lifts you up, makes you feel loved, wanted, secure and safe is.
- Some people you’ll always love, but that doesn’t mean they need to have a place in your life. Be confident enough to let go. Your mental health is more important than your ego.
- Romeo and Juliet was NOT a healthy romantic love story. Don’t seek it out.
POST IT NOTE / MANTRA: I will seek healthy romance
Welcome to my new feature on Blast the Radio called “Be a Single and Dating Rockstar with Suzie” where I share my expertise with listeners to help them navigate the dating world and find their prince or princess among the frogs!
Be a Single & Dating Rockstar with Suzie
Kissing a lot frogs with no prince or princess in sight? Dating Expert Suzie from SingleDatingDiva.com is here to help you find love. She has been through the trenches of the good, bad and ugly of dating and is now married with two children. She wants to help YOU achieve the dating outcomes you desire by navigating single and dating life effectively.
What listeners can expect: Dating CAN be fun and Suzie can show you how! She brings with her many years experience not only dating but also helping singles like you find the love they crave. She will let you in on the lessons she has learned along the way from her extensive dating, education, career and life experience. She teaches others how to navigate the dating world successfully to find happily ever after as she did. The rest is up to you! Her key message is that love is out there, they really are not all frogs, you just have to date smart and with purpose.
Copyright Single Dating Diva
Reproduction of this page whether whole or in part is completely prohibited. Please use the contact form if you would like to discuss using any content on this site.