Sex Dating: Penny For Your Thoughts (Five Bucks If They’re Dirty)

There is an increased interest in dating purely for casual sex online.  Whether this remains online or transfers to real, face to face encounters matters not, but what is significant is that people are wanting it more and more.  It got me wondering why and what sorts of encounters are these?  I browsed around and found that these sites are not only extremely popular, they are big business.  Supply and demand, right?  With the recent announcement from Plenty of Fish that they are removing their “Intimate Encounter” option, sex dating sites might be where it’s at for “adult” themed dating.

Sex Dating

sex datingWhat’s sex dating all about? It’s not all bom chicka wa wa … it’s real people wanting real encounters for nothing but sex.  Real men and women from all walks of life.  Right now thousands of people all over the world, maybe even your neighbor, maybe you, are going through online dating sites or even search engines, looking for someone to talk dirty to.  What kind of encounters are these?  Well, some people just talk via instant messaging, some send each other pictures, others are on live cams.  These could lead to meeting in real life for sex but many don’t.  Even on regular dating sites people are doing this.  How many of you have gotten random penis pics?  Early on in my online dating days I agreed to a live cam chat, not sexual, just regular chatting and the first image I got is the guy stroking his penis.  Um, weren’t we just having a normal conversation?  Seriously people warn a girl before you do that!

What’s the appeal? Well, do I really have to answer that?  Sex is a primal need and casual, no strings attached, sex gives people a place to get their needs met without the added responsibilities of a relationship.  Is there anything wrong with that? I don’t think so as long as it’s two consenting adults and they are open and honest about their intentions and expectations.  I’ve talked before about that.  It’s all good as long as people are entering it with full knowledge of what they are getting into.  Often times it’s just for regular sex, however, in many cases this is a fantasy thing too.  If someone has always wanted to try something, or has a fetish and never had the chance to try it. Sex dating sites are a great safe, non-judgmental, environment for this kind of stuff.

Safety First

Here are some things to keep in mind if you are engaging in sex dating:

  • you set the ground rules ahead of time
  • make sure to know exactly what you’re getting yourself into
  • protect your identity
  • make sure you know that you and the other person/people have been tested for STI’s
  • use protection always
  • if you are meeting a stranger always tell someone where you are and who you’re with or at least write it down and leave it somewhere someone can find it
  • use your judgment and gut instincts and never do anything you aren’t completely comfortable with
  • keep away from taking anything that will impair your judgment

Nothing is wrong with enjoying yourself and experimenting with something new if that’s where you’re at.  Just remember that this isn’t where you’re going to find a relationship and keep it completely unemotional.  If you can’t, then don’t do it.    Most importantly have fun and be emotionally, mentally and physically safe at all times.

Your Sister in Dating Bliss,

Single Dating Diva

Copyright Single Dating Diva


  1. Ha ha… You are so funny Miss Diva, or should I call you Sexy Suzie :-)…. Love your title – “Penny For your Thoughts – Five Bucks If They’re Dirty”. Funnier yet, the comment that Plenty of Fish is removing there “intimate encounter” option – my cousin was on POF, and she always got hit on by hot young studs that were decades younger than her, so she started calling POF .. Plenty Of F*ckers. Anyway, I have no problem with the casual sex stuff. Although…. I would for sure would want to get to know the lady a little bit before getting naked.


  2. All kinds of sex can be exciting and enjoyable between consenting adults, but I find it a bit sad that there are a growing number of people who choose to date just for sex (and nothing else) instead of having hot and spicy sex with someone they are actually in a relationship with (or hoping to be).

    Guys are programmed to enjoy sex in whatever form they can get it. It makes them feel good, more confident. I’m not so sure most women feel great about themselves after a long chain of purely sexual encounters – some women, yes, but not most – though it’s not fashionable to say so. I’m all for women being as free to choose sexual partners as men without being judged but emotionless sex just sounds dangerously like settling for second best to me.


    • I think the – “Guys are programmed to enjoy sex in whatever form they can get it” is too much of a generalized comment. And why should a women not feel great about having a “long chain of purely sexual encounters” Kind of hard to place your thoughts and feelings about sex into other people’s minds. Sometimes one just needs a little of that warmth and closeness that sex brings into your life. But then, that does not mean you should run wild in the streets and “screw anything that walks” 🙂


      • Oops – that was a bit of a generalized statement wasn’t it? Yes, I agree that, as in all things to do with human beings, there is a whole spectrum of behavior, desires, reactions. On the other hand there are countless studies that show those generalized statements to be true for most people. It’s how we are wired biologically. Why should women not feel great about a long chain of sexual encounters? Why not indeed? But perhaps because most of us find emotionless sex unsatisfying. I don’t think sex without emotion brings warmth and closeness but maybe that is why guys like it – they feel it as warmth and closeness. It feels sad to me if that’s the only way anyone has to experience those feelings. But maybe because that’s the way I’m wired too. The sexes are not as equal as we like to think though at least now (and thank goodness) there is less judgment about it if you think or behave in a different way.


  3. Totally not my thing, but to those out there who ARE looking for casual encounters, please don’t troll every section of a dating website for that. If i wanted casual sex, that’s the section i’d go to.

    In my experience, ALL sections of POF are requests for “Intimate Encounters”. The nickname “Plenty of Flesh” is not an accident.


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