Having a Sense of Humor as an Adult

So you think you’re funny? Perhaps you are … most likely you just THINK you are.  Everyone says they prefer a partner with a good sense of humor, but, what on earth does that even mean? Well, it means that the person can make you laugh, right? Not necessarily.  Having a good sense of humor means a lot of things and probably different things to different people.  What does having a sense of humor as an adult really mean? ESPECIALLY if you’re dating? Well, I’ll tell you.

Having a Sense of Humor as an Adult

Sense-of-Humor-as-an-AdultFirst I’ll tell you what having a sense of humor as an adult does NOT mean.  

  • It doesn’t mean cracking jokes all the time.  Jokes have a time and a place.  Unless you’re a stand up comedian up on stage, refrain from cracking jokes.
  • It doesn’t mean trying to be funny at someone else’s expense or insulting someone in order to make others laugh, it usually only serves to hurt others or make the people around you uncomfortable.  Keep race, religion and anything negative against others out of your humor.
  • It doesn’t mean trying to make people laugh with things that were funny in primary school.  One example I can pull from one of my online dating experiences, the conversation went something like this (after a normal conversation): Him: “you know what Suzie”, Me: “what?”, Him: “that’s what”, Me: “that’s not funny”, Him: “yes it is, it’s hilarious”, Me: “um not really”, Him: “you need a better sense of humor” …. yes, sure I do, come back when you’re an adult.
  • It doesn’t mean faking being a stalker. Enough said.
  • It doesn’t mean being sarcastic and seemingly bitter.
  • It doesn’t mean pulling pranks.

So then, what does having a sense of humor as an adult mean? 

  • It means finding humor in everyday situations.
  • It means being able to laugh at yourself.
  • It means gauging your audience before sharing something funny. You need to be appropriate and timely.
  • It means taking advantage of things that make you laugh such as entertainment and sharing it with others.
  • It means being relatable. If people can relate to what you’re laughing at then they will laugh too.
  • It means seeing the funny in every bad thing that happens to you.

Funny means different things to different people, as does a sense of humor.  When you’re dating you need to  be able to test the waters with the person you’re with. While one person my get your jokes, someone else might not.  It’s the random things that are the funniest.  Think of what made Seinfeld so funny.  He saw the humor in everyday life and people totally could relate to him.  That’s what made him funny.  He hardly ever told a joke.  Most successful comedians will either poke fun at themselves or everyday situations.  What makes ethnic comedians so funny? Their relatability of course!! Everyone who grew up in a similar household will totally be able to relate to what they are saying. I think you get the point.

So the next time someone tells you they enjoy a good sense of humor don’t tell them a knock knock joke. Just talk about funny things that have happened to you and if you’re out on a date and you notice something strangely funny then point it out.  You will definitely win points with your date.

How important is a sense of humor in a partner to you? Share your experiences in the comments below!

Your Sister in Dating Bliss,

Single Dating Diva

Copyright Single Dating Diva


  1. Come now Suzie, I think you have marginalised the value of a good serial killer joke! 😉

    Actually, I once posted such a joke on Twitter with the tag #SerialKillerProblems. I immediately picked up 8 new follower. 8 of the most terrifying followers I’ve ever seen. So on second thought, maybe you have a point.


  2. I was on a first date last night; and at the end, I asked for a little bit of feedback from the guy (Was I what he had expected, etc). He admitted that he had been slightly disappointed because he had anticipated more witty banter based on the humor in my writing. I almost choked behind my smile because his version of ‘witty banter’ was to make caustic chauvinistic remarks. >_<


  3. I’ve been told that I was funny. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but I do like to crack up now and then. I guess I inherited that from my father. A quick wit and a good memory can present many opportunities for laughs. I also heard that women enjoy laughter. Is that true? I was told that as long as you don’t make a woman laugh in bed, then jokes can give you an advantage over her.


    • Thanks Q! Women do love to laugh and there’s nothing sexier than someone who makes you laugh. Laughter is so good for our bodies and souls and being with someone who makes you feel good is healthy and makes you focus on happy things, that’s why there’s such an appeal.


  4. You know, I had to come back to read this again because something about this article wasn’t sitting quite right with me. So here it goes… Try not to hate me 🙂

    You aren’t describing an adult sense of humour here – you’re describing your own sense of humour. There were many adults who found Seinfeld to unbearable. Just as there are many adults who find South Park to be an absolute hoot. You can’t define “what is funny” or even “what should be funny” – you can only define what is funny to you.

    Someone with a truly solid sense of humour can read you and knows immediately how to adjust the humour to make you laugh – be it the situational humour you describe or poop jokes. That is a true sense of humour.


    • Haha Todd … Humor is personal, not everyone finds the same things funny that’s true, however, generally speaking women don’t like guys who crack jokes all the time or laugh at the expense of others or play pranks on them because you know what? Eventually YOU become the victim of this type of humor. No woman wants to be the butt of a man’s joke. That’s why the appeal with situational humor. It’s finding the funny in the moment. Seinfeld was an example of situational humor, not the end all or be all.


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