6 Old Fashioned Dating Habits We Should Totally Reintroduce
Oh yeah, this truly is a groovy time for dating. We’ve got it so good: a near 50:50 boy/girl split (that means someone for everyone), easy communication, greater integration of different cultures and a million online dating success stories for inspiration – Yay! But there’s one forgotten ingredient that would guarantee you a recipe for dating success every time: a few good, old fashioned dating habits.
Don’t be too fooled by the oh-so demure smokescreen our grandparents are keen to put up about dating in their day – they were young and horny once, oh sure. Love and passion weren’t invented post 1940 but neither was the best way to date. Grab your time machine and take a ride with me back to the future of truly successful dating.
Say It To Sway It
Now while they can’t claim all the credit, our grandparents definitely had communication nailed when it came to dating. With no option to text or message, they became the masters of old fashioned dating habits with real, person to person talking! Agghh! How did they survive the stress, know what to say? You know what, they learned. Sure they blathered a bit in the beginning, fluffed a few lines but they had real conversations with real people and ended up going on real dates as a direct result. We love the supposed security blanket of messaging but oh boy, it’s way too easy to miscommunicate and send all the wrong signals. Worst of all, there’s no YOU in a message, no personality, no authenticity so turn the clock back, be brave, speak up and go direct!
Grandfather Time Knew Best
Now Granny and Pops were certain about one thing – they knew that dating is a process that takes time. There are steps to it and there’s a mighty, fine reason why it’s never worth trying to leapfrog some when trying to secure a genuine, worthwhile date with prospects. Getting to know someone before hurtling into dating them significantly reduces your chances of meeting guys with characteristics you just don’t do! When you finally hook up, you’ll be able to chat easily, be confident that you’ve each shared your key ideals and values and will have chosen a mutually interesting activity to give the date the very best chance of success. Your dating experience just got an A+ before you even left the house.
Old Fashioned Dating Habits Rule!
Now let’s get what I’m saying in perspective a little here, I’m not suggesting we take on our grandparents’ full on rituals of courtship – uhuh! But let’s take the good bits and run… now that’s smart dating. So before you hit ‘GO’ on your date, take a minute to be clear about your ground rules, and, more importantly, your intentions. Sound too old school? I hear you, but the truth is this will save you from many misaligned dates that would seriously dent your confidence, purse and stamina for dating. Having the courage to be upfront about what you’re looking for will attract those confident they fit the bill.
Next Door For Sure
It’s a really positive sign of the times that life is so fabulously global but tread carefully when dating. Particularly for online daters, tragically it’s way too easy to contract Analysis Paralysis syndrome where comparing thousands of profiles leads to the disastrous trait of being impossibly idealistic. This is simply borne out of confusion but spells catastrophe for your intuition which would otherwise spot love in the form of your perfect match on any horizon. Adopt one of the best old fashioned dating habits of keeping your sights realistic but that doesn’t mean dropping your standards. Truth is, you want to be in the arms of a real life love, not ever waiting for a fictitious superman.
Keep The Noise Down
When planning your date take some good advice from old fashioned dating habits and keep it super simple. Complicated plans and too many distractions when you meet up will leave both of you floundering to keep the conversation and the interest going. Swap any worries you have that the date will seem boring or unmemorable for the chance to let your genuine personality be the ultimate distraction.
Cool Is For Fools
Dating today has plenty of rules, many of them great. One of them however can seriously leave you out in the cold – playing it cool is for fools! Steal one of the old fashioned dating habits from the grandma gang and greatly increase your chances of getting to know your beau better by warmly enthusing how great a time you had and how much you’d love to do it again. Waiting for ‘that call’ is going to consume you. Better to lay it out there and eliminate any doubt that he should call you. Dating nerves aren’t exclusively female after all!
Laura J Tong inspires women to transform their relationships into real life love stories. Visit her at Rekindle The Love Forever to find out what it really takes to have a lifetime of loving.
I don’t consider these old fashioned. I consider them smart. Smart never goes out of style.
So well said Michael. And in truth, I’m sure lots of people are in the ‘smart zone’ when it comes to dating. It maybe just takes a bit more confidence or individuality to do what comes naturally rather than follow current convention. Perhaps all of us here in the comments section can inspire others to check out the stylish, smart option for truly successful dating.
The one habit I would reintroduce is not to have sex. I’m not saying to wait until marriage (though that would be best but unrealistic) but not to have sex before you know them. With online has come the three date rule which is disgusting. You can’t know someone after three dates unless you knew them before dating. Since most relationships don’t last that long imagine how many people the people you have sex with after three dates had sex with. Then we wonder how many people have diseases or illegitimate babies. Many years ago dating around didn’t always mean sleeping around but many assume that now.
This needs to be a conscious decision everyone make for themselves, let’s hope they make it an informed one! Whilst the ‘old fashioned dating’ habits might seem more demure and possibly even formal to us today, hormones raged on back in those days too!
I’m sure people back then had premarital sex, I also think it wasn’t as accepted. Sex has become so casual that not having sex is less common. It can be hard to deal with the hormones.
Love a bit of old fashion dating especially the communication rule. Lets put away our phones and technology and have a good old fashioned chat. 🙂
You’re so right Emily. We say so much more than words when chatting. There’s no better way to shine with your date than to project your fabulous, genuine personality by doing the most natural thing – talking!
And don’t be nervous as well.
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