Everyone wants to find their very own happily ever after. Dates, especially first dates, should help you determine whether or not someone is a good fit for your life or if they just aren’t right for you. That is why it’s important to really know what you’re looking for. Chemistry is very important, so are “butterflies”, but so is compatibility. So what makes a good date and what makes a bad date? What is the turning point? How do we really know that we want to see someone again?
What Makes a Good or Bad Date?
Some of the best dates I’ve been on were simple and was all about talking and sharing. They weren’t expensive (most were free) and some of them turned into something more while others didn’t, but they were all great experiences. To me, a good date is one that makes me not even notice the time pass. The conversation is good, I laugh, I feel an attraction, there’s chemistry and I don’t want it to end. I’ve also been on some horrible dates that made me want to run and run fast. A bad date is one that makes me wonder why I’m there, I can’t wait until it’s over, it’s awkward and just negative all around. So what makes a good date or a bad date? Here are some things to consider …
A Good Date…
- Instant attraction
- Makes you smile
- Makes you laugh
- Conversation flows
- Date is a good listener
- Eye contact
- Things in common
- Doing something like an activity
- Date is considerate
- Makes you feel special
- Proud to be with date
- Ego boost
- Want to jump their bones
- It just feels right
- You want to kiss or hug them
A Bad Date…
- Person is weird
- Creepy vibe
- Bad / forced conversation
- Date looks at other people
- Feeling undervalued
- Date has bad hygiene
- Date misrepresented themselves online
- Date doesn’t look like picture
- Date has obvious baggage and talks about it
- You’re repulsed by their habits (the way they eat, drink, etc)
- Date treats other people poorly
- You don’t want to even touch them
- Date tries to take advantage of you
Essentially you either “feel it” or you don’t then it’s really up to you whether or not you want to see them again. Each date is an experience and a lesson learned either way, and we should be grateful for every dating experience because of that. Going on many dates with various types of people will help you narrow down what works and doesn’t work for you. In the end, you’re trying to find your very own happily ever after and all these dates should get you to your ultimate goal.
They say you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince or princess and that’s very true. But, isn’t that true of most things in life? Dating is a journey and is a process of learning and personal growth. It’s not about the outcome, which comes naturally on its own. What makes a good or bad date is how it makes you feel. Listen to your gut, it will always tell you the truth about someone. If it feels good, then get to know them more, if, on the other hand, it feels “off” then don’t continue, it’s as simple as that. The important thing is that you DO date and date often, it’s the only way to reach your ultimate goal … go ahead, kiss a lot of frogs, and, one day, you WILL find your happily ever after.
Have a dating dilemma? You can always Ask Single Dating Diva a confidential dating question on http://singledatingdiva.com.
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
Originally appeared on eHarmony Canada.