Lately I’ve been hearing the ticking of my biological clock louder and louder. Tik. Tok. Tik. Tok. I know, I’m only in my 30’s but still. I guess I just figured I’d be in a different place in my life right now. We’re conditioned to believe that by the time you’re 30, you should be married with children … white picket fence and all. But is that really realistic anymore? Not so much. Times have certainly changed. Women have changed. Most women are getting a good education and then a career before they even think marriage. Many just want to live their lives freely before being “tied down”. Some would say this is the wrong frame of mind. Not me. I think people should live however they choose to, marry who they choose when they choose to. No pressure. I felt that pressure, that’s why I got married to the wrong guy. I wanted so badly to fit in to the proverbial “box”.
You know which box I’m referring to. The one your families and communities typically carve out for you. You have to meet their expectations or else you’re a disappointment. This box is also the socially acceptable box. You’re expected to do certain things in your life or else something is wrong with you. How many of you single ladies get the “why are you still single” looks of pity from other people? Guess what? The “ooh you’re divorced AND single” look of pity is even WORSE!! I just shoot back with “why would I make the same mistake twice?” and laugh it off with them … but really I’m just being defensive. What I really want to say is that “I hate that I’m divorced and I hate that I’m single. Thanks for reminding me”. But I can’t. I have to be strong and besides, whose business is it anyway?
Don’t get me wrong. I am enjoying this new independent life. I am learning so much about myself. I am also learning how important it is to be TRUE to myself. I can’t stress that enough. I won’t settle for less, even if that means I will stay single a little while longer. I do get lonely, but I have remedies for that. I do hear my clock ticking … I really would love a child, but I will channel that energy and enjoy my niece and nephew and give them all my love and attention.
It will happen. It will come. I know it will. I just have to be patient and trust. One of my favorite books of all time is The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho and my favorite quote from this book is “when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it”. So I will have faith and be strong … the universe is listening and I will get who I really want – my soulmate – my other half. Now where’s that hammer there’s a clock I need to destroy …
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
Copyright Single Dating Diva