When it comes time to set up that memorable date with your romantic prospect, many couples opt for dinner at a nice restaurant, maybe some drinks or a movie, and then hope for the best after that. There is nothing fundamentally wrong with this dinner can be a romantic setting, and a deep, intimate conversation can be a strong base for a lasting connection. The problem is that if you’re like the average person, it is not exactly easy to generate massive amounts of sexual attraction and intimacy while sitting in one place for an extended period of time. I’ve got 5 first-date ideas that help you get that sexual energy flowing.
5 Memorable Date Ideas to Help You Get Your Sexy On!
You might wonder how the hell is struggling through a round of mini-golf going to build up sexual energy? Well here’s the thing. There’s this little chemical in your brain called Dopamine that is released when you get excited, i.e. hit an exciting shot, hole-in-one, etc. Dopamine, according to Larry Young, PhD and co-author of The Chemistry Between Us: Love, Sex, and the Science of Attraction, “mutes the prefrontal cortex, disinhibiting sexual desire and giving us tunnel vision for cues that could lead to satisfying that desire.” Translation: EXCITEMENT facilitates SEX. Even if sex is not your goal for the night, mini-golf can help build sexual tension that can be put towards a later occasion.
2. Dinner at Home
For a new spin on the classic dinner date, transform your home into a fancy restaurant and movie theater. The fact is, being able to cook is sexy, regardless of what sex you are. Make it a team effort and prepare various courses that you both know how to prepare (you do know how to prepare a good meal, right? even if you don’t trying a new recipe together would be fun!) This teamwork will help you bond, and when you have people do nice things for you, it makes you appear more valuable in their eyes (see Ben Franklin Effect). Have fun playing some music you like, like some over-the-top Italian restaurant soundtrack. Wear a funny apron. Bring out some “expensive” wine, a.k.a. something you got for 3 dollars at the local grocery store. After dinner, run out to the corner store to buy some snacks and then kick back with a movie. Light a candle, turn down the lights and curl up on the couch with your date. This privacy allows you to take part in activities that are not legal in a public movie theater.
3. Amusement Park
This one goes along with the dopamine idea, described above. Roller coasters and rides do WONDERS for dopamine – that rush you get after you have “survived” the roller coaster is a very powerful drug. Upon achieving these dopamine rushes, you will begin to anchor those feelings towards your partner and you will associate them with fun and excitement. This is a foolproof way to come across as a fun and adventurous type, which is a great quality for both sexes.
One way to take you back to your younger days is to go to an arcade. With the advent of modern video games they may not be easy to find, but these places can really make magic happen. Arcades definitely help bring out some of that free-flowing, carefree attitude that you had as a small child while running around the arcade. What better way to unleash some healthy competition than to battle over some car-racing, air hockey, or zombie-killing? Win some tickets and buy each other some silly little prizes like a small stuffed animal. Give the animal a name and check up on the animal next time you guys text or hang out. This is a great way to show some personality and have some fun with it. If you get your date a small prize that they can put on their nightstand and remember how much fun they had with you every time they go to bed it will prepare for them to start building feelings for you and makes you more memorable.
5. Shopping at the Mall
Do you ever have trouble running out of things to talk about? Try taking your date to the mall. Malls provide endless opportunities for people-watching, have stores that almost everyone can enjoy and keep you moving around, helping keep up the energy on the date. Go in stores you would never usually go to and check each other out in ridiculous outfits you would never wear. Make fun of people together. Act like a celebrity. Whatever you do, make sure you are HAVING FUN.
Now you may be wondering: what if I don’t want to have sex with my date? I just want to go slow and see if we are compatible? Sure, this is a valid argument. Maybe you don’t want to have sex. Just remember. Keeping up the energy and dopamine helps you bypass many of the reasons you don’t want to have sex in the first place. If you come across as a genuine, down-to-earth, non-needy, fun personality, there’s a great chance they’ll feel like they’ve known you forever, and you can skip that whole “are we compatible?” phase. Keep these ideas in mind next time you are planning a date, and give your partner a date they will never forget.
READERS: Do you have go to dates that help you connect intimately with your dates? Tell us about it in the comments!
Nathan Adlam is the founder of Social Sage: An Introvert’s Guide To Charm. He is passionate about learning how to get the most out of life through social relationships, and helping other people achieve their optimum lifestyles. You can find more of his work at www.socialsageskills.com or follow him on Twitter!
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