Like it or not, Social Media plays a big role in your dating life. As we’ve discussed before it can have both positive and negative effects. So how do you navigate the dating waters with Social Media? Very carefully. There is a false sense of security from dating online because of things like social media. Just because we THINK we know everything about a person, it doesn’t mean it’s true. People show us what they want us to see online. What they write/show you and reality are not always in synch, so you need to date smart and always proceed with caution, not paranoid, but smart.
How Social Media Affects Your Dating Life
Social Media is a great way to connect to others, but it’s also ripe with people creeping.
- People use it to meet others instead of using the conventional online dating channels, “friends of friends” seems a better alternative than approaching a complete stranger.
- People also use it to “fact check” people they’ve met online before they meet in person.
- If you’re going to use social media to meet other singles then don’t be creepy about it, respect people’s privacy and if they ignore you once don’t keep bothering them.
- PS: LinkedIn is NOT a dating site, many people are using it that way and it’s become problematic.
Social Media is also ripe with people looking to “catfish” other people.
- Catfishing is gaining someone’s trust and admiration before asking for money. These people approach lonely women and men, telling them what they want to hear, making them feel loved, wanted and special and then once they’ve gained their trust give a sob story and ask for money.
- You can avoid these people by:
1. Not adding people you don’t know on Facebook,
2. Ensuring your privacy settings are on the highest level,
3. Not giving personal information out,
4. Raise the red flags if someone is “too good to be true” good looking, smart AND you can’t believe your luck because they want YOU,
5. They start tugging at your heart strings, slowly, gaining your sympathy,
6. They don’t actually want to meet you in person, they don’t even try, or, they live in another country - Catfishing is fraudulent behavior and people have been scammed out of 10’s of thousands of dollars … be smart! If something, or someone, seems too good to be true they usually are. If you think you’ve been catfished or suspect someone you’re chatting with you should contact your local police.
Creeping your dates online isn’t usually a good idea.
- I asked people if they creep their dates online and over half said that they do, some to verify information shared or some to just be nosey. But they do it.
- Many also add people they’ve met online on their social media accounts. My advice is to leave something to the imagination, unless something feels “off” there is no need to creep them online.
- Same goes for adding people on Facebook, their activity online will leave you wondering and many times insecure and paranoid. So unless you know where you stand with them don’t add them or research them.
If you have ended things with someone, end it on social media as well.
- When I asked if people creeped their exes online it was almost a 50 / 50 split, but most said it depended on how things ended and why.
- I say let it go and move on, there is no need to make yourself suffer more than you are already. You can’t move forward if you keep looking back.
Use Social Media to enhance interactions, not replace them.
- Social Media is a great way of connecting with people if used in the right way.
- It should be used to enhance your interactions rather than used as a research tool.
- Always opt for face to face interactions and personal judgement above all else.
Here is my recent appearance on CTV Ottawa Morning Live discussing Social Media and Dating!
READERS: What are your thoughts about Social Media and Dating? Share your experiences and opinions in the comments below!
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
Copyright Single Dating Diva
I agree. I admit when I did online dating I searched men but part of it is because I found a few married or sex offenders. I don’t care about things like their job. I also don’t add people on social media unless we’ve met (or cases like friends of friends). Nothing creepos me out more than random guys adding me on Facebook. I don’t anymore but I often stalked an ex online. I was so mad he dumped me because I felt he was my last chance for romance. Occasionally I’ll look up an ex but to see how they are doing, though I stay in contact with a few and we update each other.
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