Are You Being E-Maintained?

When I first heard the term “e-maintaining”, I was very curious to learn more about it.  I was reading this article called Are You Being E-Maintained? What His Texts Really Mean and I was thoroughly enthralled.  You know, I never really thought of this concept of “e-maintaining”, but it makes PERFECT sense!  So what is it?  According to the article, e-maintaining someone is maintaining them — keeping them, in their mind, satisfied — and doing it electronically.  Essentially, someone being e-maintained is being kept “happy” while the other is keeping their options open.  It’s not a relationship.  It’s not a friendship (per se).  Sometimes it includes sex, sometimes it doesn’t.  Contact is consistently inconsistent.

Gee, that sounds familiar.  I have one of those.  Have you read about Mr. Consistently Inconsistent? You should.  It fits e-maintenance to a “t”. I think, though, it has evolved a little bit more.  There’s more to “us” after all this time, but there is definitely an aspect of e-maintenance.  It got me thinking though … how common is this phenomenon? I would say it has definitely become more prominent since SMS/Text Messaging has become popular.  It’s so easy to simply “touch base” with someone instead of investing real time and energy in a relationship.  Although the article mentioned above speaks about men doing it, women do it too.  Have I done it? Yes, I will admit I e-maintain some people.  Am I proud of it? Hmm I’m kind of neutral about it.  I don’t lead anyone on, not sure how they feel about it though.

I think this is a new phenomenon that is becoming more common in this non-committal world.  Yes I said it.  The world has become non-committal.  So what should we think about this e-maintenance and the casual dating phenomenon?  To me, as long as people are honest about their intentions then it’s fine.  However, most of the time people are being led on by this behaviour.  Perhaps it’s part wishful thinking, part dishonesty … but I don’t think it’s going to go away.  So what to do?  Well, as for me, I remain honest about my intentions (or lack thereof).  You need to always be honest and be realistic.  If someone isn’t making an effort then they aren’t fully giving you what you deserve.  Plain and simple.  Keep in mind, it’s a new era … a new world … what do they say? When in Rome … sigh, Rome … I need to be going there again soon …

Happy Dating!

Your Sister in Dating Bliss,

Single Dating Diva

Copyright Single Dating Diva

Originally Published on Singles Warehouse