If you talk to people who have been involved in dating online you’re likely to be inundated with tales of horror stories and negative experiences. How hard can online dating possibly be? Slap together a dating profile, upload a photo and wait for offers to roll in! If only…
The thing is, this is the attitude many people, especially men, adopt with online dating … and they wonder how it all went so wrong without realizing they’ve sabotaged their own chances of cracking the online dating scene.
As someone who has been involved with online dating from both perspectives, as a user and site administrator, I see many men making the same errors over and over. And to be honest, despite the influx or over-supply of men dating online, the well-written, funny and interesting dating profiles from men that do crop up from time to time really do stand out from the crowd – these are the guys who are dating all the girls – absolutely!
Guys, it’s time to start pulling on a few heart strings. The ladies are there willing and waiting but you’ll need to stop making it all about you and apply your efforts from a female perspective too.
Biggest Mistakes Men Make With Online Dating
Uploading Inaccurate Photographs
Lulling her into a false sense of expectation will not only back-fire, it’ll kill your confidence having to sit through an agonizing date after she takes one look at you and sees no resemblance between you and your profile snaps. Your profile pics must be recent and profiling the real you.
Don’t post half naked photos of yourself – so you go to the gym, she doesn’t really care that much at this stage of the game. What she does find attractive and alluring though, are photos of single guys who are happy, handsome and real.
There’s a fine line with online dating between flattery and creepy. I often see complaints from female members who are being flooded with persistent flattering messages from the same person. I’m sure you have good intentions thinking you’re flattering her, but just think about it, she doesn’t know who you are so put yourself in her shoes and think about that for a moment? Subtlety and sincerity is what works best.
“Hi there” or “Would you like to chat sometime soon?” isn’t exactly going to stimulate her moan zone. It’ll just make you sound like the other zillions of guys hitting on her. Before you message her, read her profile! Ask relevant questions, let it be known that you’re interested in HER, not every single other girl on the dating site. Don’t overexpose yourself, keep it modest, sincere and a little mysterious.
Taking Too Long To Act
By not giving up, and using the advice I’ve offered so far you’re setting yourself up to attract more interest. Now that she’s convinced you’re charming and interesting, it’s time to take it offline and step out from the keyboard. She’s not looking for a pen pal, so ask her out for a non-formal date now that you’ve gotten to know each other a little better.
No one likes to feel like a number, so if you’d like to turn the tables on your online dating woes, be respectful, be yourself, keep it personalized and start having FUN!
Matt Fuller is the creator and administrator of Free Dating Australia which is a popular choice for singles looking online for love and dating opportunities in Australia. Follow Matt’s updates on Google Plus.
Readers, what do you think? Ladies, what are some of the things that raise your red flags when online dating? I would love to hear about it in the comments!
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
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