Single is NOT a Bad Word

Single is not a bad word! You CAN be happily single. It’s all about perspective and living a full life. Many of us spend our single lives unhappy and unfulfilled, looking for that other person to complete us. We grow up with fairy tale fantasies about finding our “other half” which gives us unrealistic expectations about what we really need versus what we want.

Being happily single allows you to have a better outlook not only on yourself but on everyone around you, giving you special discerning muscles to weed through the dating jungle. Whether you’re single by choice or by circumstance, being happily single IS possible and necessary if you want to find the happily ever after you always dreamed of.

What Does It Mean To Be Happily Single?

Not having the added responsibility of a partner allows you the freedom to do all those things that you’ve always wanted to do. Being happily single means to use this alone time to enrich yourself, for personal growth, checking your baggage, increasing self-confidence and relationship building. Keep your life full with activities and people and no pity parties allowed! It is essential that you let go of the drama and despair because you are not the only one who’s single.

It is said that you become who you surround yourself with, so ask yourself – are your activities and the people around you building you up, encouraging you and bringing out the best in you or are they making you miserable? You need to take inventory of your life to remove all those toxic influencers. Being happily single really is all about being the best version of yourself and being satisfied with your life regardless of your relationship status. Having a partner should just enhance your already fabulous life not make it fabulous.

Attracting the Right Partner by Being Happily Single

In order to be a beacon for the right partner, you need to BE the right partner! What this means is that you already have your life relatively in order, you look and feel good and are projecting a confident, positive energy. You don’t NEED someone in your life, you WANT them. There’s a difference. This, in turn, results in healthy, mature relationships minus the insecurities and drama. If you are not happy alone, I can assure you that you won’t be happy as a couple either.

The person you’re with should also add something positive to your life. When someone “completes you” then you are using them as a crutch and when and if they are not there anymore you can no longer stand on your own. That’s why it really isn’t about finding your "other half", you must be a complete person and when you're a complete person who finds another complete person you will have a healthier relationship. Plain. Simple.

How Being Happily Single Makes Dating Fun Again

Dating is fun, it’s all about perspective and attitude! Think of it this way, when you’re doing something you look forward to you’re happy and excited and when you’re doing something that is a chore you’re dragging your behind and can’t wait until it’s over. Being happily single tremendously affects your attitude to dating making it a positive experience and, best of all, makes red flags that you would usually ignore if you’re lonely, more obvious.

Being happily single allows you to lighten up and enjoy the process without worrying about the outcome. As a result, you meet a lot of great people, some may work out to be more, some just become great contacts or you may never speak to them again. Whatever the case may be, you gained experience that enhances you. Take each date as a learning experience about what is out there and what you’re looking for. It also means being able to let go of someone who isn’t right for you because you know you’re better off and that you’ll be fine alone.

Not convinced yet? Well, I realize this perspective certainly takes some getting used to. It took me a long time after my divorce to realize that single is not a bad word and I have been happily single ever since. My new attitude towards dating allowed me to attract more quality, it has also given me the courage to let go of less than ideal people in my life. We sometimes rush into things that aren’t right for us because we’re lonely, but you don’t need to be. There are so many ways to enhance and build your life keeping you so busy you won’t even realize you’re single. Being single in a world of couples is challenging I know, but having the right attitude about it will definitely attract the right partner at the right time. So are you up for the challenge?

Your Sister in Dating Bliss,

Single Dating Diva

Copyright Single Dating Diva

Originally appeared on Power2DoIt a motivational magazine from Ottawa, Canada!