There’s a lot of competition out there in the dating world, no one can deny that. That is why you have to be able to stand out from the crowd as something special. Just because you think you’re a “catch” doesn’t mean that you are (especially if no one wants to catch you!). The dating world has changed tremendously over the years, especially in the recent digital age. Whereas before you were competing with the people in your immediate area or social circle, now you’re competing with everyone in your city or even country. This is why you need a competitive edge. Sound like too much trouble? Well, even if it is too much trouble it’s very much worth it in the end. Trust me. Putting in some extra effort now will help make sure that your dating life has positive outcomes. So it’s time for a reality check and some honest advice. Each one of you has something great to offer … Now sell it! Here’s how to determine what makes you “dateable”.
What Makes You “Dateable”? Start Here…
In order to be “dateable”, you need some key things in your arsenal. You can’t just put yourself “out there” and hope for the best. Remember what I always say, you are the product and you need to market that product effectively in order to get buyers. Where would big brands be without good marketing? Same goes for you. That gorgeous smile and a clean shirt will not take you very far. You really do need much more, including some great sales pitches. Not too sure where to start? Here are some simple ways to help you win at self-promotion in the modern dating world!
- The first thing I always get my clients to do is to write down the top 5 reasons someone would want to date them – these have to be unique to you and not generic things like “good sense of humor” or “well educated” … more like “my love of adventure leads me to go on unique trips like climbing Kilimanjaro” or “my passion for the arts has led me to take up painting”.
- You have to know what makes you different and stand out from the crowd then SELL IT!
- I like to say “don’t play hard to get but be hard to forget” – be unique and show your date or potential dates why they should choose YOU and NOT someone else (saying you have a good sense of humor just doesn’t cut it anymore, sorry).
- When you know what makes you special you’re better able to market yourself as an ideal partner and it gives you more self-assurance.
- This doesn’t mean being conceited about it, but it definitely means being confident and confidence is extremely important in dating, passive personalities don’t do as well in modern dating – remember that CONFIDENCE IS SEXY!
Image Is Everything!
- Never leave the house looking like you just got out of bed (put some effort in how you look because you never know who you’ll meet).
- If you’re online dating, have a great online dating profile picture, here are some pro tips:
- Have good quality picture… This means they’re not grainy or fuzzy or cut off, they are a clear representation of who you are.
- Your picture is your logo and because most people are visual by nature it’s your picture that will draw them in (or scare them off).
- Make sure your picture is clear, recent (not older than a year or two maximum)and eye catching.
- I always advise my clients that they should have three pictures – one good headshot, one full body shot and one picture of them doing something they enjoy.
- When a person meets you for a date, they should immediately be able to recognize you just from your picture.
- Wear clothes that suit you and fit properly.
- Don’t wear clothes that are messy, dirty, too revealing or have holes (I shouldn’t even have to tell you this).
- Wear location appropriate clothing (gym clothes don’t belong in a restaurant), a good outfit for a casual date would be a dress shirt/well-fitted pants/dress shoes for men & nice top/nice pants or skirt/dress/nice boots or shoes for women.
- Have good personal hygiene and grooming practices always – be clean and smell good, don’t overdo it on the makeup or scents (again I shouldn’t have to tell you this).
- Be aware of your non-verbal behavior – eye contact is very important, be careful about your facial expressions, tone of voice, gestures and body language (posture, how you walk). Body language speaks volumes!
- Always smile and leave the stink face at home (when you look friendly you give off an approachable and positive energy).
Be The Person You Want To Date
- Have an attitude of gratitude (when you’re grateful for what you DO have, you suddenly end up getting more of what you want & life doesn’t seem so bad after all). Daily gratitude brings love your way, it really really does.
- Be happily single (when you’re happily single you give off a confident, positive vibe which attracts people like magnets).
- Do good (volunteering and charity work is VERY attractive to others).
- Leave your baggage at home (no one wants to help you carry it or hear about it).
- Be a good conversationalist (keep up to date on current issues in the world and your city, always have topics ready).
- Be a good listener (this includes being engaging with active listening and asking appropriate questions).
- Be passionate about something (when someone sees you’re passionate about something they get excited too & it’s very attractive).
- Be assertive (go for what you want, no one wants to be in relationships with passive people).
- Be active & social (when people see that you’ve got a good social network and active in your life they want to be a part of that).
- Be friendly to everyone around you (this includes service staff, saying please and thank you to everyone, don’t be an ass, etc).
So there you have it … some ways to make yourself more “dateable”. Making that extra effort to promote yourself effectively goes a REALLY long way!! Don’t miss out on a great dating opportunity because you didn’t market yourself adequately or put your best foot forward!
READERS: What makes you “dateable” or stand out from the crowd? Give it some thought and share it in the comments below!
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
Copyright Single Dating Diva