First of all, what is a “soul mate” anyway? That term gets thrown around a lot. Everyone is looking for their “soul mate”. Wikipedia defines “soul mate” as “the person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity, similarity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, or compatibility. A related concept is that of the twin flame or twin soul, which is thought to be the ultimate soul mate … the one and only other half of one’s soul.”
Wow! Deep stuff. Do I believe it exists or is it just a romantic notion someone made up? I personally believe soul mates do exist. But I don’t believe that they are only those who we are romantically involved with. I think some people who walk on our life’s journey are also our soul mates. Not everyone, but some. You know who they are. You have such a deep connection with them it’s uncanny. It might be your sibling or a best friend. Someone you’re naturally drawn to. For some, they are lucky enough to find this in a romantic partner. But can it happen more than once? I believe so.
The romantic notion of one soul mate we have in our lives is a dangerous one. It causes us to doubt ourselves and the relationships we have. Is there just one person out there for us? Well the older we get and the more relationships we have, we know the answer is no. We definitely can have more than one. I have no doubt. Each person comes into our lives at a certain time for a certain reason. Some for a short period and some for longer periods … time does not equate validity.
What makes a person your soul mate? To me it’s the connection you have with them. It’s like you’ve always known them. Like you’ve been through lifetimes together. It’s not a romantic love sort of thing. It’s a connection like you’ve never felt before. You feel it at the core of your body. Being with them erases all worry and trouble. It’s like the rest of the world doesn’t exist. Being without them is painful. They are like a drug. Now is it this intense with all soul mates? Not sure. But this is my notion of my romantic soul mate. My friend soul mates have an equally strong connection with me but not as intense, but maybe that’s because it’s different.
I am lucky to know how this feels, but also unlucky that sometimes I have to feel the pain rather than the bliss. But that’s life isn’t it? I will leave with something I read once … I think it’s relevant … the author is unknown but the message is valuable: “soul mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect but are always perfect for you”. I hope for all of us that our lives are filled with these people who are perfect for us, whoever they may be and that we all find our soul mate.
Stirring the Dating Sauce,
Your Sister in Dating Bliss,
Single Dating Diva
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