From Shame to Power [Be a Rockstar]

These posts are meant to lead you be your most empowered self and help you overcome those things that are holding you back from reaching your goals. Some of this might resonate with you, or not, and I’m not here to judge anyone or their actions, only to give you something to think about.

Shame is defined as “a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior”. We have all been there, you know, the cringing feeling we feel. Studies have linked shame to negative self-talk and low self-esteem, among other things leading to mental un-wellness and negative judgement from others. Rather than our experiences empowering us, they render us powerless.

Essentially, shame is the feeling that there is something wrong with you. It differs from guilt whereas shame is more a feeling self-judgement and hidden while guilt is knowing you did something wrong and feel bad about it. However, what people think of you, whether they are judging you or not, is more about them than about you so celebrate your authentic best self.

According to some, “the feeling of shame comes from the belief that, “I am basically flawed, inadequate, wrong, bad, unimportant, undeserving or not good enough.”” We end up believing that we are the cause of other people’s reaction to us, not liking us, etc because we are not good enough, and, as a result hide behind the shame in order to not face reality.

I am in no way immune to the feeling of shame. I am full of regret about many shameful events in my life, but slowly, one step at a time I am taking my power back by taking those experiences and learning from them as well as forgiving myself for the actions I did when I was seeking validation from a place of vulnerability.

Where to start:

  • Name your shame – you need to ask yourself why you feel shame in order to better understand the root cause of your shame.
  • Forgive yourself – kindness and compassion with yourself is a key component of getting over shame, then you can forgive yourself for your past actions.


Your “Feel Good Journal” will be the main tool in your power arsenal. Your morning affirmations and evening gratitude will help you not only take on the day with empowerment, but will help you appreciate anything that happens throughout your day.

“Shame is the lie someone told you about yourself.”

[Anaïs Nin]

Your Takeaway

  1. Shame is internalizing the judgement of others towards us regarding something we said or did and can result in looking at our selves negatively.
  2. In order to take your power back, you need to “name your shame” and ask your self why you feel it in order to better understand the root cause of it.
  3. Forgive yourself for whatever it is you feel shame for. Then, be kind and compassionate with yourself. What is done is done, it is time to take your power back by owning then releasing the power shame has over you.
  4. Practice your morning affirmations and gratitude daily in order to make sense of each action because giving it meaning will take away its power over you.
  5. Understand that what people think of you, judgement or not, is more about them than about you so celebrate your authentic best self.

TRY THIS: Write down and reflect on the things that you feel shame about then work towards releasing the power it has over you. Seek professional help if necessary.

POST IT NOTE: I will turn my shame into power!

Click for recorded segment exclusively on SHAME [8:53 mins]

READERS: What are your thoughts on this? Please share in the comments!



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