Conversation Starters That Will Get You a Reply Online Dating: Guest Post

For the most effective online dating you should be ready to have some effective conversation starters to begin your interaction. This will not only enable you to begin discussions, it will give you material to discuss later on. What if you are not very good at conversation starters and have difficulty interacting with someone? Not everyone is a natural, but here’s a good start.

Conversation Starters … What To Avoid

conversation-starters-online-datingDon’t Just Say Hi!

The truth is that your “hi” will go straight to the trash in the majority of cases. What people are looking for is something more concrete, proof that you’ve read their online dating profile. Be more original and make some effort. Read the profiles attentively and reference the information from it which is a great conversation starter. This will be easy, especially if you have shared interests. You can always find some clues to who they are in the headline, the username, their hobbies or the pictures in their profile that will definitely give you a perfect conversation starter.

Avoid Generic Messages

A mass copy and paste job is NOT OK! You should avoid it in your online dating. Pay attention to their profile writ-up and what they are looking for and make sure you meet their criteria.

Avoid Spelling and Grammar Mistakes

You need to be mindful of spelling and grammar mistakes or inappropriate slang. Well constructed messages including some emoticons, maybe an “LOL” or two is best. Avoid clichés and bad references where possible. Don’t ruin your conversation starter by using the wrong spelling version of a similarly sounding word.

Avoid Propositioning Someone

If you’re on a serious dating site and the person you’re interested in hasn’t clearly stated they are looking for something sexual then sexual innuendo is a BAD conversation starter! It will either guarantee you a trip to the trash can or a nasty response back. Stay classy and be respectful!

Conversation Starters … What To Do

Have a List of Questions Ready

Online daters should always have a list of questions they are prepared to ask as a conversation starter. They may be creative sentences like ‘If you were [insert place or situation] what would you do?’ and other similar ones. Questions will help you get to know them better online and eventually offline.

Be Patient

There is no need to refresh your inbox a thousand times a day in order to see if there are responses. Be patient. All people like being answered immediately, but it’s not always possible to do it so don’t worry if you can’t get to it right away. People are always somewhere busy doing something so be patient.

Be Polite

The best rule is the “Golden Rule” to treat the other people the way you want to be treated. Your behaviour and manners can speak volumes about you and your personality. Remember you’re speaking with another human being, it’s easy to get carried away when you are online, still be careful what and how you write being mindful of their feelings. Remember NOT to be too clingy or give off the “creepy” vibe either.

Conversation Starter Ideas

Here are some conversation starter ideas to help you on your way, talk about:

  • family and friends (are there any siblings, how many, how close is the family, family or friend traditions, etc)
  • career and work (what do you do exactly, enjoy or maybe aspire to something different, etc)
  • travel or vacation (last vacation, impressions, etc)
  • dreams and aspirations
  • lifestyle, hobbies and activities
  • food preferences
  • hidden talents and special skills
  • entertainment preferences

Starting a conversation is easy when you know what mistakes to avoid. With these conversation starter tips you will be able to initiate contact with someone that will get you a reply online dating!

READERS: What are some of your favorite conversation starters online? Share your tips in the comments below!

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  1. My problem is that some women have nothing on their profile other than “ask me” or negative stuff like what they are not into.
    What I am most annoyed by are ladies that message me and expect me to carry the conversation or ask no questions about me.


    • Thanks Leon! If someone has nothing on their profile then they’re not worth talking to … typically it means they’re just passing the time and not really looking for anything substantial.


  2. I’ve always appreciated it when someone demonstrates that they’ve read my profile. The person I’m currently dating – with whom I share a love of finding fun new restaurants – made the comment that we both had a shared restaurant interest and asked me what my latest find was. It was a perfect opener because it was an actual question, and it was something that made me feel like his approach was specific to me.

    I’ve received so many generic responses and it’s highly irritating to be reminded that he is reaching out to multiple people (but of course, we all are).


  3. One of the most interesting starters I ever received was about seafood. I had listed that my favorite food was seafood and a guy emailed me with that in the topic. It told me he read my profile. Most men either didn’t read at all or sent a generic hi and that’s a turnoff.


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