These posts are meant to lead you be your most empowered self and help you overcome those things that are holding you back from reaching your goals. Some of this might resonate with you, or not, and I’m not here to judge anyone or their actions, only to give you something to think about.
We are all unique individuals that live in a world of information overload which makes it difficult at times to not react or be impulsive when something triggers us. Because of this, more and more people are getting offended for anything and everything. What is taking offence? It is being or feeling insulted, offended, or humiliated by something.
It could be related to the empowerment movement or maybe some people just have a lot of time on their hands, or even, people are emboldened by hiding behind a screen. While there is some value to taking offence, we need to question the purpose and if what we are taking offence to is actually worth our time and energy.
Taking offence is a choice so you have to choose too flip the switch and see things objectively, realizing that the things you read, hear and see are not always ABOUT you. Your sense of justice could be blinding you to reality. Being offended is giving others power, take your power back.
Zero tolerance for bigotry, racism, xenophobia, homophobia and all other is important. Some things are worthy of all of our offence and even the smallest off color comment or joke triggers taking offence, as it should. We should be able to determine, however, what truly deserves our emotions and taking offence and what does not. There is a fine line but the line is there. More often than not using the opportunity to educate others rather than taking offence is more effective.
causes for glory
There is such thing as being hypersensitive, however, and taking offence just for the sake of taking offence. Some people get behind a cause and beat it to death or attach to it for their own glory or as a patch for their own baggage. For example, taking something someone says the wrong way because you are viewing it with your own lens. We often see things as we are, not as they actually are. Rather than championing a cause, some use it for their own selfish purposes. There is no open dialogue but there should be.
dialogue not attack
The virtual environment has led to people who are emboldened to comment, hurl insults and destroy others just because they can. They use taking offence as a completely self-serving purpose. This can be someone who constantly attacks someone who does not share their views or opinions. There is nothing wrong with having a respectful debate or a sharing of opinions, what is wrong is consistently attacking others in the name of taking offence.
Some take offence to any feedback they receive, even if it is given in a positive and equitable way. For example if their supervisor gives them some comments or advice on their work. This has nothing to do with the supervisor and everything to do with the employee. There is something inside the employee that triggers their response; this is usually due to a lack of confidence or related trauma. Feedback is important and should always be accepted with open arms. That’s how we grow and learn. You do not have to accept the feedback you receive, but at least take it at face value and do not get offended. If you regularly do, then ask yourself why.
You could also be taking offence because of someone who is gaslighting you. Gaslighting can be defined as someone who causes another to question their own reality. The gaslighter can make you second-guess your perceptions of reality, your memories of a situation or even your beliefs. They purposefully invalidate you by countering what you said or diverting it. Using stereotypes also falls under this, for example saying that “women are always emotional around their time of the month” to mansplain why she is angry or cannot do the work he can. Stop giving power to these people and take back your power.
- There are causes that are worthy of our offence – namely racism, bigotry, xenophobia, homophobia and all other discriminations – where the smallest comment can trigger a massive offense.
- Some people, however, are hypersensitive, and they take offence for the sake of taking offence. Rather than championing a cause, they use it for their own purposes.
- The virtual world has emboldened those who are looking for a voice but use it to attack and destroy those who they do not agree with or who they want to take down without the opportunity for respectful discussions.
- Some take offence to any feedback they receive, even if it is given in a positive and equitable way. This is usually due to some unresolved trauma or confidence issues.
- Gaslighting can also be a cause of taking offence. Someone who gaslights another makes them questions themselves, their abilities and their reality by using stereotypes, for example.
TRY THIS: Take note of the things that offend you and determine whether they are due to your own worldview, your ego, and your mental health or to actual societal issues.
POST IT NOTE: I will not take offence to everything
Click for recorded segment exclusively on BlastTheRadio.com: OFFENCE [8:47 mins]
READERS: What are your thoughts on this? Please share in the comments!